Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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