Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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