NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize