I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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