Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
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