He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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