seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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