chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize