just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
