also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
