just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize