After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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