so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
