He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
