haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
