and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
