I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Im part way to drunk.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
