so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
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