speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
