we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
