Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
