remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize