Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
