So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Randomize
