Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
