SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Randomize
