a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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