Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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