Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
