im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Randomize
