What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize