question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
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