i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
