We need to start having sex underwater more often.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Randomize
