When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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