Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Randomize