I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Jerry, you need to find god
its not stalking. its research.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
