he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
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