so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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