He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
My feet surprised me
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
