i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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