jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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