Please, let me fuck your mom
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Girls should come with a carfax report
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
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