Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
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