I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
we have officially lost it.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
