I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
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