hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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