she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Randomize