clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Randomize
