I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
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