i think i have herpe
just one?
P.S. I can't hear my feet
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
