I think I won the penis lottery.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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